5 thoughts on “Summer Haiku #1

  1. pi314chron

    Like many of the best haiku, yours is multilayered with riches! On a more personal level, though, please forgive me for using your haiku in a rather mundane way! I’m trying to convince my wife that the Moon is responsible for the lackadaisical manner I’ve been approaching the task of boxing up our things for a move to a new house. So far, she’s not buying it! 🙄

    -R-

    Reply
  2. Bill

    Great images in this one–the moon ascending as ambition dies.

    The final word, “withers,” sets the tone of the poem. I’ve been having fun playing with it by substituting other words to achieve an entirely different effect and meaning. For example, “soars,” “returns”, “revived”, “rests”, “awakens”, etc.

    Excellent poem.

    Reply
  3. m lewis redford

    beautifully [not-crafted] crafted (… found): I like the contrast between the first and third lines – the mirroring, almost – but there is no sudden cutting, just the slow process through the thick air; one of the best haiku I have read in a long long time through the thickness of air

    Reply

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